- Words of Affirmation
- Quality Time
- Receiving Gifts
- Acts of Service, or
- Physical Touch?
Alternatively, a simple way to discover her primary love language, and therefore also the kind of gifts she will most appreciate, is to listen to and observe your everyday interactions with her to discern what she has left unsaid.
For example, hearing her say, “You’ve never thanked me for driving you to the MRT Station every morning!”; could be an essential clue to let you know that receiving words of affirmation and encouragement from you can brighten up her day.
In such cases, we’d like to suggest gifting her with a unique card with personally written notes communicating appreciation and love. Try shopping for creative cards from Etsy.com, a marketplace for artists showcasing their beautiful handmade one of a kind cards available for shipping to Singapore.
You can add to the card a bouquet of flowers or a simple gift basket. What’s most important though, is not so much the gift, but that you had thought of her, and cared to write and send something special.
Tip: A good time to send such a gift would be when she badly needs a pick-me-up. If you have heard her lament that she had a stressful time managing multiple crises at work, your gift will make a significant difference when it arrives at her work desk!
On the other hand, if you’ve heard her say something like, “You’re always on your iPhone! Did you even hear what I was trying to say?”; could suggest that what she will most likely appreciate is time alone with you. In this case, giving her your full attention with a private dinner at a quiet eatery, or a quick weekend vacation would be best. Misa Travel provides good value getaways to nearby destinations or you could check out tours to more exotic destinations such as Transylvania, Romania or even the Arctic Circle.
A wife who’s love language is physical touch will often appreciate a simple stroke on her back, holding hands, a hug or peck on the cheek. For special occasions, accompany your affections with a simple gift of her favourite scent, an intimate dinner or a night out to the movies.
Whatever you do, remember to focus your efforts on being sensitive to how you can express your love through the gift of a simple touch more than anything else.
If you were to discover that your wife’s primary love language is receiving gifts, then do take the time to shop around and buy an item that will symbolically mean more to her than the dollar value of the item.
For example, a piece of jewellery will be extra special when presented to her right after she becomes a first-time mother.
Flowers have also been used to express what is in the heart of man for centuries! Did you know that almond flowers speak of hope, a china rose means “beauty always new”, a four leaved clover says “Be mine”, heather communicates admiration, honeysuckle, bonds of love and the (useful) hyacinth says “I am sorry. Please forgive me”.
Floriography is the language of flowers! Learn more about it here.
We suspect that she will also be impressed, with your effort to create a treasure store of memories with a Photobook. Easy, accessible, high quality and affordable. The end result will look professional and position this gift to weather the years to turn into a heirloom the two of you can pass down to the generations.
Finally, when your spouse’s primary love language are acts of service, know that she will appreciate having you support her in completing the chores and tasks around the home. You can team that with a treat to a spa or massage and facial experience but whatever you do, remember, that the gift she will treasure the most is practical helpfulness on your part.
The how-tos for selecting the perfect gift for your wife does not need to be a lifelong mystery. Just try to listen, understand her heart language and respond.
Gift giving has the power to affirm, appreciate, encourage and communicate love, vital keys to a healthy home and a happy wife.
“The best gifts come from the heart, not the store.” Sarah Dessen, Author
 The 5 Love Languages series was authored by relationship counsellor Dr Gary Chapman, director of Marriage and Family Life Consultants, Inc. Dr Chapman also hosts a radio program on marriage and relationships that airs on over 100 stations and can be heard via the internet.
About the Author: The Dads for Life Resource Team comprises local content writers and experts, including psychologists, counsellors, educators and social service professionals, dedicated to developing useful resources for dads.
Categories: Fatherhood 101